Loki's Pain
by Shadowhunting-Mischief
Summary: Short story about Loki struggling after the avengers. In places it's quite sad.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything written here. It is all owned by Marvel. As much as I would love to own Loki, I don't. This is entirely Loki based so if you don't like him, don't read. **

**Authors Note: This is my first Fanfiction. Any comments are welcome as well as criticism. At the moment I'm unsure whether to continue or not but I will decide soon. Enjoy! ;-)**

Loki sat in his 5 meter by 5 meter cell and sighed. He had been in the same cell for nearly 15 years. It was a long time for anyone to sit in a cell. Especially for the God of Mischief. Against one wall there was a tear stained mattress. Loki moved to it now. As he sat down the solid spring dug fiercely into his skin. The only light in the room came from a small window high up the wall. Yellow light filtered in, casting shadows across the room. Just another painful reminder. He would never escape. Loki bowed his head. His overgrown black hair filled his vision hiding the horrors of his cell. He preferred it when it was dark. Then he didn't have to see his own blood staining the floor in various shades according to how recent his injury was. It was the evidence of his failure to free himself. From the times when he still had hope and strength. When he repeatedly flung himself against the solid iron door until he was broken and bleeding. When he had clawed at the wall to try and drag himself closer to the tiny window in the hope he could break it. He would get so close only to fall again and again, until his hands were bloody and torn or he hurt too much to continue. Not once had the guards ever checked on him. He had simply been left to die. Without his magic he had to heal naturally. Slowly. Like a mortal. Of cause Odin had taken away his magic as soon as Thor had handed him over, like an unwanted dog. Thor, his once trusted brother, had simply given him away without ever even looking at him. He turned his back and walked away. He had never visited him. Never even asked about him. For years Loki had sat, waiting for his brother**. **Hoping, no praying, for him to visit. When the nightmares had returned, he would scream for Thor. But he never came. Not once. Eventually Loki gave in. He had been abandoned by everyone. It was just another type of torture. Being made to feel like he needed someone. To feel weak. To feel…mortal.

Every hope had left Loki. He had nothing but pain here. Nothing left to live for. He knew he would never leave here. At least, not alive. Maybe not even then. Perhaps they would just leave him here, in this cell, to rot. Until there was nothing but bone left of him.

There was no doubt in his mind that he deserved punishment, but not this. Never this. He would not wish this fate on his worst enemy. No-one would ever deserve his life. Not now…

Loki placed his head in his hands and sighed. Loneliness, it turned out, was a strange thing. It claims the soul and never lets go until someone else saves you. Loki had been lonely for a long time. He missed people.

Occasionally Odin would visit to check the wards around his cell were still in place. Never anything more than that. Not even a glance. Eventually, about 3 years ago, his door had stopped being guarded. When Odin was sure Loki no longer presented any threat, when he was too weak to, Odin ordered the guard away. The only sound now was his own ragged breathing. Strangely enough, he missed their random and violent insults and their loud footsteps. At least he knew someone else was there. Now, in this horrible place, he was entirely alone. It was a strange feeling for the God, to feel alone. Like he needed someone. Desperately. Not just anyone. Loki needed Thor. As much as it shocked him, Loki really missed his brother. He missed his booming voice and bone crushing hugs. He would give anything to see his traitorous face. To hear his laugh… anything. Thor was the thing he most missed. More than anything in all the nine realms and beyond. Now more than ever before in his life, Loki needed his brother to be there for him. To rescue him from himself. Loki threw back his head and screamed the only thing he could, "THOR! Thor please!" Loki whimpered. Tears trickled down his face. He was broken. The only thing that would ever fix him was Thor. Only he would never come. Never fix him.

Loki gave up. He sasurrounded by frozen air and nothingness and cried. His violent sobs rocked his frail body. "Thor"

**That's it. Please review. You know you want to. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note: I have decided to continue this story thanks to my reviews. This chapter is mostly Thor related. Still with a lot of Loki though. Hope you enjoy and happy reading! :-D**

Thor sat gloomily in the dining hall. People buzzed around him. The feast was in full motion. And yet Thor was unhappy. It had been 15 long years since he had lost his brother. His special Loki. Odin had walked up to him a month after Loki had been returned to Asgard and told him Loki had died. Thor had been so angry. He had blamed his father. He had destroyed everything in his path. After he had calmed down he had realised a painful truth. One that still pained him to this day. It was his fault. He had handed his brother to Odin. He had been the one to walk away from his younger brother, to never visit or ask about him. He wished he had gone to see him, if only once. Thor never even knew where Loki was. Now, as he sat in the damned hall, something was unsettling him. Something urgent that was pulling at the corners of his mind. Something that was demanding attention, like someone was calling his name. Thor looked around him. No-one would notice if he left. Slowly, deliberately, Thor made his way to the door. He slipped out into the dark corridor. Night had fallen quickly over Asgard. Thor hurried to the main gates. As he entered the courtyard part of him wondered what he was doing but something deep within him pulled Thor towards the now open gates. Before him stretched the forest. A dangerous place to be at night but Thor moved anyway. It was almost as though he had no control of his body. As he disappeared into the forest he began to run. Thor had no idea how he knew where to go but he knew, somehow, that it was right.

Suddenly, the thing in the corner of Thor's mind broke free and Thor slammed to a stop. In his mind he saw Loki. He actually _saw_ Loki! He was collapsed in the middle of a floor that looked to be stained with blood. Thor stared at his brother in horror as he searched desperately for any sign of life. There! Loki's body shuddered as he took a shallow breath. Thor tried to move towards his brother but found that he couldn't. His vision blurred and he was aware that he was falling. "NO!" Thor screamed out as his vision returned and he found himself once again in the forest. He was on his knees and, to his surprise, he was crying. Thor had never seen Loki look so weak. Thor wiped away his tears and stood up. Odin had lied to him. Loki was alive and needed him. How _dare_ Odin pretend Loki was dead! Thor knew now why he was here. He needed to get to Loki before it was too late. He knew in which direction to go and he once again let the pulling feeling show him the way to his brother. He would find Loki!

Thor continued to run through the night, as though his own life was dependent on him getting to Loki. Nothing stood in Thors' way as he crashed through the forest vegetation. Thor was a long way from home, a long way from help. A faint light was creeping through the trees, casting an eerie glow to everything. He knew he was Forbidden Lands. A place of danger. No-one lived there due to the poisonous mists and stretching marshes that were to easily to get lost in. Thor exited the forest and as far as he could see the Forbidden Lands stretched. No-one was sure how far it lasted. It was a place Thor had hoped he would never have to go. But for Loki he would travel the nine realms. Thor knew Loki was there, somewhere. So he started to walk. Small, spiky plants replaced the tall green trees of the forest. A single crow soared high above Thors' head; its screeching cry was the only sound to be heard over the land. It wasn't long before the forest had completely disappeared and Thor was deep within the Forbidden Lands. Thor scanned for any building but found none. Sheer exhaustion was soloing Thor and his breath became heavy. Just as he was about to give up he saw it. In the distance, about 3 miles ahead, was a small building. With energy he didn't know he had, Thor began to run. The mucky yellow light seemed to illuminate his way as he ran. Soon he had made it to the door. Loki was inside the building, he knew it. Thor flung himself at the door which provided little resistance. A single flight of stairs where in front of him, so down he went. Only to stop in surprise. At least 100 doors stretched ahead of him. With a sigh, Thor began to open each one. Thor had torn through 87 doors before he heard a slight sound behind one. It was a tiny sound, like a whimper. Thors' heart began to race as he ripped door 88 of its' hinges. Loki was exactly as Thor had seen him. Tiny on the floor. Thor looked around. The blood that stained the floor was defiantly belonged to Loki. He knew his brother had desperately tried to escape. Loki shuddered as another breath rocked his tiny frame. Thor went to his brother. He picked Loki up and held him gently in his arms. Lokis' green eyes fluttered opened and for just one moment, Thor stared into his brothers' familiar and caring eyes. Loki sighed, a tiny sigh, and closed his eyes. His face was so drawn and there where deep shadows under his eyes. But at least he was alive. Thor realised he was crying when a single tear drop landed on his brothers forehead. Thor was happy. So happy he was crying. He finally had his brother back. "Oh Loki, I promise I will never leave you again. My brother"


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors note: This chapter is dedicated to loulou98 for being a really amazing friend and very patient. And I know, this chapter is very late out and I'm very sorry about that. Anyway here it is, enjoy. **

Loki felt as though he was floating. He was confused. Had it actually been true? Had Thor been standing over him? Or was it just another dream? Thor, his deep blue eyes and his blond hair. Loki missed him. Surely his brother had not come back for him? It was impossible. Thor hated him. It must have been a dream. Just another dream. But then why did he feel like he was being carried?

Odin was furious. He paced the majestic throne room over and over again. He had visited Heimdal to try and find his son. His only son. It was obvious Thor would find out eventually. That Loki was alive. He had been stupid to assume Thor wouldn't find out. But still he was angry. Thor had fled _his _feast. He had gone deep into the forbidden lands. _He had broken the law. _He was with that _Loki. _Loki had destroyed his family. It was all Loki's fault. Thor would never forgive him. Not for this. Not for pretending Loki was dead. Thor was too loyal. He would stay with his precious Loki. His brother. He would never forgive him. Thor would challenge him. Thor would take everything from him. When Frigga found out she would kill him. She would side with Thor. The whole of Asgard would be turned against him. He couldn't blame Loki this time. It simply wasn't an option. Thor was going to make sure he had nothing left. He would be ruthless. Odin sighed as he sat on his throne. It was all over for him now. Damn.

Thor held his brother close. Loki's limp form clung to him. It was so familiar. To hold his brother like this. He used to do it all the time when Loki was younger and nightmare plagued him. It used to be the only way Loki would sleep. Thor had moved the two of them upstairs into what seemed to be a sleeping quarters. It must have been for the old guards when they were here. Loki stirred in his arms. A small shudder passed through his slender frame. Loki made a small sound, frightened sound. Thor felt a sudden hatred for Odin. His so called father. He had reduced his strong, cocky proud brother to just a shell of a man. It would take everything for Thor to restore Loki to his previous glory. To bring his beloved brother back. Thor was willing to try. To do anything to save his defenceless brother. Even if it meant losing his place in Asgard. Even if it meant being banished. He would do anything for his brother. And when the time was right and Loki was strong again he would see Odin brought to his knees and made to pay for what he had done to Loki. He would do it all for Loki.

**Thats it. Please review, please. (free virtual Loki cookies for anyone who does)**


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